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January 17, 2016

Why Let How You Look Cause You Pain

by James R. Yarbrough

Mirror Mirror On The Wall 1-11-16

Your Achilles Heel

(Everyone has one.)

There is no one who doesn’t have that one thing that causes insecurity about his or her appearance. It has as much to do with what you think others think about you as what you think of yourself. It could be your nose, your hair, breast or just about anything that has been deemed not to be how it should be. When you think this way, you will never be at ease and comfortable with yourself, the real you. You cannot be happy, no matter the circumstance or your status in life, until you resolve the issue you have with what you think you see when you look at you. Reflections do not always tell the truth.

The images you see in the magazines, on TV shows and throughout the media are not the prototype of the human. It is mostly an illusion, a fantasy created to sale an image of perfection. The perfect dazzling white teeth, long flowing hair and a curvaceous body with all of the accompanying accouterments. And as one would expect, those who this bothers the most will try to change things about themselves, even things that cannot or should not be changed. They spend loads of time and money on how they look, how they dress and right down to how they walk and talk.

Time and money surely are important, but not as important as your health. And some of the things are putting the people who do them at risk. It is no wonder when you look at how some are criticized and joked about for this one physical feature that is looked upon as a flaw and not the will of nature and how you were born to be. All the while they are using this ridicule as a defense mechanism to fight off their own insecurities.

The jokes and harsh words can be personal and quite nasty. Those who are adept at it can be creative with their techniques, while others show no mercy. The focus is always on those aspects of your person that are easy to attack. It is just superficial; yes, but it hurts nonetheless. Making these critical remarks with hurtful intent has become acceptable—it is “everywhere.” In casual conversations, in movies that we see, in magazines and even in some of the books that we read: There it is. It is no wonder that anxiety, low self-esteem and insecurity are at an all-time high.

You cannot hide, for long, what is inside about how you think about your outside. So, you think you are different, that there is no one who has your perceived shortcoming, your “defect.” In reality there is no one who doesn’t have a defect of birth of some type, some cover it up and others have procedures to change what many times are just normal abnormalities. Nothing that millions of others all over the world don’t have as well. Try telling that to yourself. For if you see you when you listen to these words, it is time to hear it and learn from it. It is not easy, at first, to accept that which you have lived with as you would an unwelcome guest, but this you can and must do. There are some things you cannot change; you have to change how you think about them.

We have men, women, girls, boys and even young children—more so today than ever—who have become entrapped by the marketing of major businesses and a brain-washed society. The very people who should know better are caught up with the rest in the swirl of the marketing monster. We are now looking for the ideal when it is not to be found for it is always moving and changing. And there is no better way to separate you from your money than creating “false” insecurity and a sense of need. Know what is being sold before you buy. Money will not buy self-esteem. You have to earn it by changing how you see yourself.

If all of the people of the world were in one place, you would see much and much of what you would see would be no different than what you have seen; just “everyday people.” Everyone is beautiful at some place to someone whereas using the so called standard of beauty very few would be. Let me put it this way: There is no perfect person, physically, mentally or otherwise and few who meet the marketing criteria for beauty. On one of your typical days out and about, how many “beautiful” people do you see, few if any who have the looks of the gorgeous magazine models and the assortment of celebrities. It is all a make believe world full of illusion, makeup trickery and manipulation. It is not reality; it is not what you think you see.

We all have physical differences from height, weight, ears, eyes and all of the other variations that come with being a living organism, a creation of nature. Even the appearance of the genitals causes much anxiety and personal and social discomfort. And the public buys into it. There are billions spent annually on Labiaplasty, vaginal rejuvenation, penis enlargement and other body modifications by men, women and even teens.

White Man Getting Out of Bed

First thing in the morning before your feet even touch the floor you are thinking about one thing that is never far from your mind. You have tried to not think about it and that is why you do. If you cannot change it, you have to change how you think about it. You wish to hide it from the mirror but what’s the use, it will still be there when you look. You do not have to be perfect to be perfect in the things that you do.

Nothing is hard to do, you just do not know how to do it yet.

 

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