The Sense of Touch
Good for You and Good to You
Touch is the first of the five senses to develop in the womb and thereon plays an essential role in our everyday life and even to our own very existence. While the other four senses (sight, hearing, smell, and taste) are in specific parts of the body, the sense of touch is found all over. A nerve, also known as a sensory neuron, comes from every part of the body to carry impulses to the brain or spinal cord about the condition of the body. Within the body, the nerves are like the branches of a tree. They run to every part of the body, from the soles of the feet to the top of the scalp and from just below the skin to the inner organs such as the heart, liver and lungs. They give us information about the things of which our body comes in contact with. And body to body contact is one of those things.
The skin is the largest organ in the body. The nerve endings in our skin tell us what we feel, physically. The skin is a feeler. It is the organ used by the body for touching. Some areas of the body are more sensitive than other parts because they have more nerve endings. The most sensitive areas of the body are our hands, lips, face, neck, tongue, fingertips, feet and in the vaginal and groin area. Women tend to have better sense of touch due to smaller finger size. All they need to do, in my opinion, is to use them more often, as should men. The body is more sensitive in different areas for a reason. Through the sense of touch, we detect if something is squishy, wet, juicy, smooth, rough, hard or soft.
If you are normal, with no hang-ups, it feels good to be touched by those you want to be touched by. Now, of course, if someone touches you and it is not the touch that you want or the right time that is different. It can be a very unpleasant feeling, to say the least. It can cause you to react in a very unpredictable way, as you know. This, usually, does not have a good outcome. Or what is worst, you say nothing to the offender. You have to be the master of your world to be in touch with your Self. So, do not be touched when you wish not to be. The most intimate senses, of course, are the sense of smell and touch. When you feel it, you will know it. And who would have ever thought that there would come a day when there has to be a national campaign to let people know it is OK, even a good thing, to touch again. This, if nothing else, tells us that political correctness has become a caricature. It is making fun of itself.
There are married couples, would you believe, that go for years and never touch each other. Some take it a step further and sleep in separate beds in different rooms. Now that is bad and is not good for any reason. We know some of the best touching goes on under the sheets. Touch is likely the last sense we use just before we taste it. What about those taste buds on that tongue. You may see it, you may hear it, you may smell it, but when you touch it, you know it is real. Just as with love. “I want a love I can feel the only kind of love I know is real.”
There is nothing more real than the feel of the human body. That is when I know that you are there. To move slowly your hands circuitously from the crown of the head to the bottom of the feet, on the way taking in the hills, the valleys and sweeping the curves. Around the toes making sure to spread them apart gently using each of your fingers, size appropriate, between each toe. Reaching and stretching to massage softly the “fat meat.” All the time the scent beckons you to the honey pot. It is the smell of nature’s pearl. There is no better feel or smell than that of a fresh washed body—not just any body—where there are no cover-ups, no fancy displays and adornments. Now some like it a little sweated up from the start, after exercise, or some other activity, when the “funk” is high. However you like it you know it is right when all you hear is the silent call of desire. A whisper though no word has been spoken.
The body has a language of its own. It tells you what it feels. The back will arch, the thighs will flex and tense, and the mound of Venus will quiver ever so slightly. The body prepares itself for the man and woman as the brain directs the fuel of life to areas that say, I need you now. The juice flows, the tide rises and the boat floats. All is ready. You move to be received. There is an ache of desire and a flame of passion that blinds the eyes for we need not see. All from a thought, a smell and the human touch. You are in another world though you have not left the one you are in. It is a free fall as you pass yourself and leave your heart behind. Touch the taste of the body sweet. And find me where the minds meet.
Touch has a tremendous impact on most animals’ physical and psychological well-being. Our skin containing sensory receptors allows us to identify several distinct types of sensations. Numerous studies of humans and other animals have shown that touch greatly impacts how we develop physically and respond to the world mentally. So this leads me to talk a little Sigmund Freud, “the father of sex, and his theory.” This is only as it relates to touch and I have my experience from childhood that illustrates his theory. But first, let’s talk about the breasts.
In the first eight to twelve months of your life, a baby is often frustrated in his or her need to suckle. This can be because Mother is uncomfortable or even rough with, or tries to wean too early, then the baby may develop an oral-passive character. Now remember this is coming from Freud. An oral-passive personality tends to be rather dependent on others. They often retain an interest in “oral gratifications” such as eating, drinking, and smoking. It is as if they were seeking the pleasures they missed in infancy. He just maybe on to something here.
When we are between five and eight months old, we begin teething. One satisfying thing to do when you are teething is to bite on something. Your Mother’s nipple, such as, is one of the things you find tempting. If this causes a great deal of upset and precipitates an early weaning, you may develop an oral-aggressive personality. These people retain a life-long desire to bite on things, such as pencils, gum, and other people. They have a tendency to be verbally aggressive, argumentative, sarcastic, and so on. Even so, it appeared to Freud that the infant found its greatest pleasure in sucking, especially at the breast.
Before I wind things down on the sense of touch, it would be remiss of me not to say a little something about sex. And as I mentioned, Freud was if nothing else the self-anointed sex master. For Freud, the sex drive is the most important motivating force. In fact, for him, everything, all of our actions and thoughts, somehow has its roots in our sexuality. Freud felt it was the primary motivating force not only for adults but for children and even infants. He was not bashful about promoting his theories and the public in Vienna—where he introduced his ideas—was more than a little shocked. These were not the most enlightened times.
The capacity for orgasm from a neurological sense is there from birth, this is true. But Freud was talking about more than orgasm. Sexuality meant not only intercourse but also all pleasurable sensation from the skin. It is clear that babies, children, and, of course, adults, enjoy being touched, caressed, kissed, and so on. Freud noted that, at different times in our lives, different parts of our skin give us the greatest pleasure. Later theorists would call these areas erogenous zones. Now let us move on to my arousal. My first memory of being turned on.
I remember my aunt giving my cousin and me baths in a number 3, size washtub. She is a year older than I am and always acted older than her age. My body and mind at the age of three, or maybe it was four, did not know any difference in what I saw and what I was feeling. It was all the same and had no label. The last bath, of this kind, was when my aunt noticed my aroused state and the routine came to a sudden end. It was as if a warning sign popped up in her head.
My aunt would sometimes keep me when her sister, my mother/aunt, who I lived with, was at work. So I am sure the coed bathing had gone on for a while. And I can only imagine how overworked my sense of sight must have been and I am all but sure I snuck in a little touch here and there. None of it lasted long enough for me. As with most things in a young mind, the feelings moved on after that dreadful day. There was no carryover of feelings for my cousin, of course, I did not know what a cousin was at my age. I was just getting in touch with my feelings. It was just carnal not a thing personal about it. It could have been anyone. The feeling would not have changed.
Hearing the bad news of the end of my “greatest pleasure,” I did what a small child with big thoughts would do, I acted my age, crying and having a fit. I ran under the house to hide, which is what I would do when I did not get my way. Not being able to have what I wanted when I wanted it is something that would hound me for years to come. There are many things that you can have, but few of them you can have your way all the time. Even if you could it would lose its appeal before long.
The Sense of Sex
This is the first in a five-part series on the senses. The five basic senses are smell, hearing, sight, taste and touch. They let us live and are the means to be in contact with the world around us. They make life what it is, without them, we could not survive. You have to be in contact with your world to be in touch with your Self. We live by our senses. They tell the brain what they have seen, heard, tasted, smelled and felt. Then the brain sends commands to the body. The senses are tools for the brain. They are the means by which we receive outside information for the brain to evaluate and respond.
First up will be smell, yes the olfactory of them all. There is some disagreement, though not by me, on which sense is the most developed at birth. It is thought by some that it is the sense of touch. Others, I included, say that it is the sense of smell. It is well-known that newborns know their mothers by their scent; how they smell. It is what no other has, the “scent of a woman,” and they can tell. And let us be frank, there is no wonder why when you consider the path to birth. There are smells that you just cannot forget, and for me, I do not want to, ever. Though, I would say it is more an aroma that stirs the soul. That tantalizing smell of the female will not be mistaken, no matter how long you may have “been away.” Just with a whiff, you know. It is the most powerful odor there is. This surely was not by mistake. The journey of our creation starts there and our birth ends there. It was designed to be that way.
There is a biological reason why the sense of smell is the most developed at birth. It is that we may survive and procreate. And no matter your beliefs, it is as we were created to be. Recent research (http://www.nih.gov/news-events/nih-research-matters/restoring-microbes-infants-born-cesarean-section) has shown that Babies delivered via the birth canal acquire a microbial community (microbiota) that resembles that of their mother’s vagina. Babies born by cesarean section tend to acquire a microbial community that more closely resembles that of their mother’s skin. The microbiota acquired by a newborn are thought to be essential for the development of a healthy immune system and metabolism.
I could go into all of the details but I will summarize to focus on the benefits. Vaginal birth provides protection for the baby that cesarean birth does not; though, as the research shows, exposure to the Mother’s vaginal fluids after birth does provide some of this protection. Now, what does this have to do with the sense of smell. Here is where I take over.
The baby who travels the length of the Mother’s birth canal certainly would be fully immersed in the smell of the vagina. It is in the vagina where the most contact will occur with the baby’s nose and mouth. The scent cannot but make a lasting impact on the mind and memory. It is as it is meant to be. It would not be otherwise. The male and female are different and so would be the effect.
It is unfortunate that women—mothers or not—are now covering up and trying to rid themselves of the smell that is a part of who they are. The woman has been made to feel shame of her body and scent. It is so sad. For we need the human smell to remind us that we are. And we wonder why it seems that man and woman are not as attracted to each other, as they once were. It is not the same. There is no denying it. There really should be no wonder or reason to ask why. But there is. Why does it seem that there is some hidden hand that is trying to pull us apart. Whose agenda is it? When we interfere with nature, nature will talk back.
We are born with our senses and for good reason. It is so that we may live. And we have to provide the stimulation for them to carry out the roles that have been assigned to them. So, when you smell it, taste it, see it, hear it and feel it you will know. It is for us then to create, invent and discover those things that awaken and give life to the senses. We have to put a name on people, places and things to know what and who they are when we meet them again. One thing for sure though, we have been stimulated by each other, just as we are, from the beginning. The most intimate senses, of course, are the sense of smell and touch. When you feel it, you will believe it. And the sense of smell tells us much about things in our environment even when we cannot see, hear, taste or touch them. Though, smell does affect our taste and the things we are attracted to or repulsed by, which prompts me to ask, have we covered up our natural smell to the point that man and woman have lost their natural attraction to each other.
How does the sense of smell work?
Smell is a very direct sense. In order to smell something and know what it is, the scent, with the least amount of adulteration, has to make its way to the nose. The sense of smell brings us into harmony with nature, and sharpens our awareness of other people, places and things. It can influence our mood, help us to respond to those we meet, who we want to be near and who we want to see again. Our sense of smell is not as accurate as that of some animals. This is what “they” say. Well, the animals are not dumb at all. They use their sense of smell for finding a receptive mate and mating partners. The very same thing we use to do in the beginning. Being civilized now, and human, I guess we think it is not needed anymore. We cover up our natural scent with all sorts of perfumes, lotions and potions.
Certain scents, that still smell the same, can remind us of past relationships and people we have known. They can stir memories that you may have once thought forgotten. Some scents make a picture come into our minds. Some make us feel relaxed; others make us feel excited. There are still segments of the science community that hold on to the notion, for I believe that is all that it is, that other mammals use a separate set of sensory receptor cells in their nose to receive social and sexual information from members of their own species. I say, we do to. It would not seem so to some because we have stepped away from our natural self. At times, it is hard to tell what is real.
The social behavior of most animals is controlled by smells and other chemical signals. We are losing our ability to smell nature’s scents. We have invaded our sense organ (the nose) with all kinds of chemical concoctions to make ourselves smell better. And this often suppresses our awareness of what our nose tells us. Many have been taught that there is something shameful about body odor. I do not embrace this teaching. People who actually use their senses of smell to test things usually say that they “sniff” whatever substance they are testing. And there are “sniffers” or should I say, those who like to sniff.
You hear it said that men are visual creatures and this may be so, but smell of the female body drives the average, even less than average, man wild with desire. It makes the heart race, the pulse quicken and without intervention will explode to an orgasmic finish, many times at the blink of an eye. Let me set up a scenario that was not at all uncommon in years gone by. There is likely no such need today as things are more easily done. It was all you had in your toolbox and you had to go there when all else failed. Back in the teen days when you have found a place with just enough privacy to be with the girl of your desires the girl of which your hormones have led you to is when you pulled out that line used by so many boys. This would usually be in the backseat of a car, a room away from the parents or just about anywhere that would accommodate two teenage bodies in heat.
The atmosphere would be charged up with hormones and adolescent lust of desire where begging was the norm. You could not ease your way to where you wanted to go because of the one thing that stood in your way, the forever despised girdle. The small girls would even wear them as a defense against the probing mind and body parts of the teenage male. As much as you try, you are getting nowhere further than kissing, rubbing and hugging but there was always that last angle to play. At this point you were in agony and you needed to release. Well, OK, OK, then, just let me smell it, let me put my finger in it. And surprise, more times than not this would lead to where you wanted to go all along. Need I say you would delay washing your finger for as long as you could hold out. My point is, it is nature it is in us, not by us but for us. No one taught you this, no one told you. It is just in you as a male. Your nose would take you there. To a man it is more aroma than smell. It can make you weak in the knees and firm in the joints. It all seems to be fading away in the fog of body washes, and summers eve.
Mating: when mating first took flight it was helped by instinct and smell. In this day and time, of course, we try to cover up as best we can our natural aroma. Man and woman likely did not look that different from each other so it would not have been looks or some special getup or hair style that fired up the desire for sex. Or romance. Unlike today, man and woman did not have sex face to face, which came to be known as the missionary position. So named because early missionaries advocated the position as “proper” to primitive Peoples, to whom the practice was unknown. I believe this to be legend. Though it would be interesting to know how this really came to be. And as far as I know, no other animal do the do while facing each other.
Yes we are animals and man and woman were covered with hair, for good reason, with just four things of note setting them apart. Those things that made the difference, of course, were the sex organs and the female breast. It had, and has to be this way for the survival of the species. And, of course, without perky and firm breast how would a newborn eat? Whether we believe we were created or evolved, we could not be the same. We had to be different to be. Man and woman were built to accommodate each other, for mating. The penis and vagina were not born by accident. Survival and sex (reproduction) are our strongest drives and they are with us from the start. Some choose to deny it, some run from it and others rush to embrace it.
Just a little sniff will go a long way. Leave your mark and men will follow you—that is—if they can smell you. Sex is in our nature as living beings. And so is our scent.