You may be about ready to ask, “What’s with all this thought and thinking.” Well, what could be more important to our sense of Self and well-being. Our thoughts, and how we think them, are what determines what we do and say. What we want from our lives depends on it. They are our own and the only thing we have that cannot be taken from us.
Thoughts will come and go but they do not go away. You will not undo a thought. Once we have a thought we think it or it lives on as just a thought. There is not a thing that a thought will reverse to. Though, our perception of which our thoughts are based on might change. This, in turn, could change what we think. You can, have the thought again. But not think about in the same way. If it connects with things in your life, it will move forward.
You must know the existence of a thing to have a thought about it. When you do know, but do not remember, you know no less. A new thought will remind you if a need should arise as you go about your life. You will not know how much you know until you know more than you know now. We do not use what we know as we learn it. We use what we learn after it becomes knowledge.
Knowledge is when you have a full and complete understanding of what you have learned. That is how and why it is knowledge. Know what you think you know. Know what you do not. Knowledge will do you no harm. How you think about what you know can. For you will feel and act on what you think. You can be perfect doing what you want to be perfect. But you will not be a perfect person for that is not our role to be. Nor will you always think in a perfect way but your actions should do harm you or anyone else. There is never an acceptable reason to hurt others or your Self, that is, unless others are wanting to do harm to you are those who you love.
Life is made up of decisions that you and I must make. There are times when you must decide on what you do not know. If you do not know what is around the corner you may decide not to go. How we think our thoughts can lift us up or hold us down. Depends on what we do with them. You have no power greater than to think your thoughts. Thinking is fuel for the mind. How great it is to use. Just by its nature though, we tend to spend more time thinking a negative thought, not that we think more negative thoughts. And it is for good reason; thoughts that are negative in nature requires more attention. And will “conjure” up all types of scenarios. It can cause you to imagine the worst and you can dwell on it to no end. If it does leave, it will keep coming back until you think it through.
The most negative and damaging thought you can think is when you let what you think others think about you cause discomfort and worry. What others think about others is what bothers others the most. You should not let any of that kind of thinking by others cause you a minute of discomfort. Let no one influence your thoughts to make you feel bad about not only yourself but any person, place or thing. Lord knows they will try. It is more than likely that they would not approach you with this in mind if they did not think they could.
How you act is what will lead others to believe what they do about you. That is, if they do not have their own reasons to think otherwise. But for those with no agenda, it is how you are thought of when they think of you. How else can they know who you are. When you change how you think, if that is what you need to do, you will change how you act; therefore, you change what is thought of you. Painful thoughts cause us to think in a way that does not serve us well.
When you have painful thoughts, there is a cause. Painful thoughts if you take the time to think them will show in how you act. You can come to depend on it. And then take it a step further and think that it is normal. Of course, it never is. Yes, it does hurt to think hurtful thoughts. What you think should not be the cause of pain. When your thoughts are not clear, how you think will be disordered. It will not allow you to be the best that you can be at what you say and do. One of the most difficult tasks in life is to understand how and why we think the way we do. You must know how to think the way that is best for you. Do not let how you think be based on thoughts you are not sure of, for how you act would be unpredictable.
If our thoughts are not certain, not a thing else that we do can be certain. And you will not have confidence in what you do. Thoughts like this you should not let take up room in your mind. It will cause mixed feelings. Then, yes, you will act in ways that you cannot always foresee or be certain of or predict. Do not let these kinds of thoughts take hold. It will leave you with a conflicting view of what is real. It is critical that you see your thoughts for what they are. For when you do not it is sure to lead to Self, sabotage.
Do not let a disordered mind tell you what to do, yours or anyone else’s. If you do, you will not think in a rational way. When you do not think right, what you do will not be right. All wrong things come with a price. This is so even when you do not know the cost. When how you think is out of control and causing harm, you are the last one to know. We are not soon to realize it. When things are not right, you look at all the other places, first, for an answer. One thing that is for sure though, we will not harm ourselves with full knowledge of what we are doing. It goes against the first law of nature. That is growth and survival. And to grow you must be strong and able to see with your mind not just your eyes.
I cannot say it enough, how we act is what others use to judge us, and it is the face that we show the world. Our thoughts and feelings are not meant to be seen. They are revealed by the way we act. It is by this that we are known. We relate to others by what they do. A “lay” person doesn’t usually go into the particulars about what a person is thinking or how they feel. What is in our hearts and minds cannot be known. And whether we accept it or not, no one is obligated to understand us.
It is not as hard for you to change how you act, as it is not to. Yes, I do know that some of what I say here may require a second or at times a third reading. But if you listen it will be as clear as a bright sunny day. When you start to think better and see better, you will act better. If you do not see you—think—whom do you see. Someone is touched by what we say and do and we are touched by what others do. How we think is where it all begins. And there is not a time when we do not think. That is not the problem. What we think can be.
Childhood: Continue to read if you have had one. This may not relate to you directly; however, indirectly I have no doubt that it does.
When how you think and act is the result of the pain you feel, you must trace your pain to where it leads. That would be your childhood. Our childhood is real and the affect that it has on us—good or bad— is real as well. If you have memories of your childhood you would rather not think about you must look back one last time to take care of this problem for good. First, though, you must let down your defenses, drop your guard, maybe, for the first time. That your view may be clouded by time and the hurt that you felt does not change a thing. You were a child in an adult world. It does not matter; it is the thoughts of your childhood that hurt. If it is not you, it is someone you know, whether you know it or not.
If the trip is too difficult to take alone, hold on to my hand and I will take you there and back. Millions around the world were born into and grew up in a dysfunctional childhood environment. There is where the roots were planted and they sprouted and grew from a life being interfered with. You must go back to this point. It is where your path to a right way of thinking begins.
Is it the way you remember it to be? Some things we can change, others we have to change how we think about them. The past will never be changed. Memories of days since passed should not be your guide. This is for a good reason. What we can recall about the past can change. Then our memories are more false than not. They tell us what was, not what is or what is going to be. You can go to the past when you want, just remember to leave. There is no room there. All the things there have already been. The past is filled. It is not meant for us to spend more time there than in the present.
If you suffer—there is not just one way—you do not know why. If you knew why you would not suffer. The why is, you tell yourself that you are not worthy. You think that you are not good enough; that you do not deserve to be yourself and be happy. Do not say that in any form. If you do, know that it is not true. The Self, does not want to hear it. When we hurt ourselves, there is a memory that has hurt us. When love is not there, the place where it should be will not be left empty. Hurt will fill its place.
The drive to survive is born with us. It is the first law of nature. Do not do harm to what has been given. This will cause grief and will harm others in your life, as well. Most of the problems in our lives today are caused by how we think. Not how others think. We bring them on ourselves. Many times, it is when we think we know the thoughts of others as well as we know our own. It is how you think.